Skepticism's Ableism Problem

I have a new drinking game for reading the comments on Freethought Blogs. All of them. Bet you can figure out what it is.

You bet your ass that if a post is about asinine behavior, someone in the comments will internet-diagnose the person in question with Aspergers/an ASD. Because, of course, all autistics & Aspies et cetera behave so out-of-the-norm asshattedly as to come to the attention of fairly widely read bloggers. And obviously, autism is the only thing that could possibly make someone such an asshat.

Except no.

I mostly see this, actually, in the context of misogynist deed being committed, someone says "well duh, Aspie dude" or something to that effect. The dude in question has never in any of these threads been listed as autistic. Ever. Except by NT onlookers who are looking for a reason to feel superior-"I'm not a misogynist" isn't enough, they've got to exert their NT privilege too!

Fun fact, y'all. We're skeptics too. And as an autistic woman, I cannot tell in which way I feel less welcome in the community. The sexism is awful, and the way you try to blame it on people with my fucking neurology is not acceptable.

Now excuse me, I need to go do a shot for each instance of "dumbass" and "stupid" and a whole bottle for the "asshole=autism" thing.

Aren't you an enlightened bunch?

Apparently not.

Does this exist?

I'm an atheist. I have disabilities (I swear I've started a post that same way before).

Groups that are full of religion and prayer requests are extraordinarily uncomfortable for me. Yes, seizure exacerbations or sensory issues or GODICANNOTTALKTODAY are all shitty things. But 'praying for me' isn't going to do anything. I know it's a reflex for many people, I think for a lot of them it's kind of like "I will keep you in my thoughts", but that doesn't change that it's uncomfortable. I mean, thoughts and goodwill are nice and all, but overall they don't do anything. Neither does praying, but you can't say that without a lot of fallout.

I think what I want to find is a secular, truly secular, group for all disabilities or all neurodivergences or even one for epilepsy, one for autism. I'm talking nearly aggressively secular here. One where it's ok to say flat out that prayers aren't going to help the actual problem. One where I don't need to worry about being called satan's spawn because I disagree with something totally not even about religion (or if I do, for that matter. That's pretty much not ok).

And not just for me, though selfish motivations brought me down this train of thought. Lots of people are of minority religions. It's just as uncomfortable, I'm sure, for someone Pagan or Jewish or who follows Islam to listen to people beseeching Jesus on their behalf. Maybe it isn't. But if it is, then I want to see that lessen.

What do y'all think? Know of any? Know a way to make it work?

*and yes, I do know a number of people of many faiths who I love dearly. They probably know a number of atheists and followers of other religions who they love dearly.*

On Atheism & Disability

I've been noticing something lately:

In groups centered around disability (at least the ones I know of), there's a lot of godding it up.

I mostly hang around the autism & epilepsy parts of the disablilitysphere, & I hear a lot about praying, I hear a lot about "His will be done", I hear a lot about evil. I hear a lot of thanking God (or equivalent) when a treatment does what it is supposed to do.

I hear that my neurology is an act of evil, the destruction of God's Perfect Creation. And I hear that anyone who doubts that is an agent of Satan.

Say what now?

I'm an atheist. I believe in no gods. I don't believe in any gods. I strive to live an ethical life and to be the best Neurodivergent K I can be. I know damn well that when my medications work, it has nothing to do with God, but with science working. I know damn well that when things don't work, it isn't the work of Satan, but of an incomplete understanding of all brains and mine in particular.

If it makes someone feel better to pray or engage in other superstitious behavior, more power to them. As long as they aren't hurting anyone, good for them. I can sort of see how believing that one's own or one's child's condition is part of some giant ineffable plan makes it easier for some people to deal. I disagree, I think it's magical thinking, but again--whatever helps you sleep at night.

That isn't how it's used, though. I don't just see the harmless ritual around the disabilitysphere.

I see blame.

I see vengeful religion.

What is vengeful religion? It's prayer and faith as a weapon. It's using your gods to say "you are a horrible person for disagreeing with me, and I wish more than anything that my skydaddy would strike you down." It's "LALALALA YOU NEED TO SHUT UP BECAUSE MY GOD SAYS I AM RIGHT". It is things like "I pray you don't work with people" after a disagreement. It is things like "you are evil and work for Satan" because one is atheist. It's angrily 'praying' that my heart be softened or whatever because I am clearly bitter or something about being me. (Fact: I like being me. Who I am doesn't believe in gods. Whoopie shit.)

If you are theistic, and you run across me or another disabled atheist, don't jump to self righteously pray for me; it's obnoxious and condescending. Don't assume that when I argue with you or state that I don't believe in gods it's because of bitterness with my lot in life-I'm not. Seriously, I'm pretty great. I am pissed as hell about poor treatment, I am pissed off by holier-than-thou self righteousness, I am pissed off by a lot of social problems, but I am not bitter about your invisible friend testing me. Imaginary things aren't worth being mad about.

The behavior the imaginary things are used to justify, though--that's often worth my wrath.